everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
My ATM looks so different sober.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I'm sobbing to NWA
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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