he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
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