Your mouth is God's brothel.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Randomize
