Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
