She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
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You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Randomize
