Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Randomize