Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize