Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
My penis needs a shock collar
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize
