So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
third nipple confirmed
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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