I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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