I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
