garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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