you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
You are the jesus of drinking
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
