My nipple is on Facebook.
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
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