just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
