So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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