you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
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