When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
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