My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize