So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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