it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Randomize
