Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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