absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
he thought i was a dude.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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