plz talk dirty to me
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
