Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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