Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
It's just like the Real World with babies
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
