can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
