There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
