We're like a lot better than the average bears
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
