No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
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