Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Randomize
