i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize
