I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Randomize
