I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
