she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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