I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
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