so that wasnt chicken after all
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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