she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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