Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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