even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize