okay pat passed out under dana's car
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Randomize
