Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
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