At least make sure they are 18
Why
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize