How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
