And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
It was confusing and full of hummus
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
