you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Also, beer. Big fan.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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