the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
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