We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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