i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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