I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
