She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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